Friday, December 22, 2006

Just Had to Share

Eating Tips for The Holidays

1. Avoid carrot sticks. Anyone who puts carrots on a holiday buffet table knows nothing of the Christmas spirit. In fact, if you see carrots, leave immediately. Go next door, where they're serving rum balls.

2. Drink as much eggnog as you can and quickly. You can't find it any other time of year but now. So drink up! Who cares that it has 10,000 calories in every sip? It's not as if you're going to turn into an "eggnog-aholic" or something. It's a treat. Enjoy it!!!! Have one for me. Have two. It's later than you think. It's Christmas!

3. If something comes with gravy, use it. That's the whole point of gravy. Gravy does not stand-alone. Pour it on. Make a volcano out of your mashed potatoes. Fill it with gravy. Eat the volcano. Repeat.

4. As for mashed potatoes, always ask if they're made with skim milk or whole milk. If it's skim, pass. Why bother? It's like buying a sports car with an automatic transmission.

5. Do not have a snack before going to a party in an effort to control your eating. The whole point of going to a Christmas party is to eat other people's food for free. Lots of it. Hello???

6. Under no circumstances should you exercise between now and New Year's. You can do that in January when you have nothing else to do. This is the time for long naps, which you'll need after circling the buffet table while carrying a 10-pound plate of food and that vat of eggnog.

7. If you come across something really good at a buffet table, like frosted Christmas cookies in the shape and size of Santa, position yourself near them and don't budge. Have as many as you can before becoming the center of attention. They're like a beautiful pair of shoes. If you leave them behind, you're never going to see them again.

8. Same for pies. Apple, pumpkin and mincemeat - have a slice of each. Or, if you don't like mincemeat, have two apples and one pumpkin. Always have three. When else do you get to have more than one dessert? Labor Day?

9. Did someone mention fruitcake? Granted, it's loaded with the mandatory celebratory calories, but avoid it at all cost. I mean, have some standards.

10. One final tip: If you don't feel terrible when you leave the party or get up from the table, you haven't been paying attention. Reread tips: Start over, but hurry, January is just around the corner.

HAPPY HOLIDAYS EVERYONE and here's to a new year of lockdom!!!!!!

Tuesday, December 05, 2006

Same Style, Slight Variation

Honestly, this is where my sister wanted to leave off initially. She started complaining how my hair was too thick and probably wanted to call it quits anyway. I'm sure my, "Not too tight, not too tight" every two seconds didn't help either. But I wanted to go for the more conservative look having the back braided up. Assuming you consider a mohawk conservative, lol. Plus I told my sister a few days later I could take the back down and have two hairstyles from one. So that's what I did. Voila!

Saturday, December 02, 2006

Mohawk Do

Last night I attended a business gala and of course I pondered what to do with my hair. As I gave it some thought there was a set of requirements that I needed which included:
a) preferably an updo and something different
b) not doing it myself cause I'm too darn lazy
c) not going to the salon because I don't feel like putting forth the time or money
So I'm going over in my mind, how in the world do I satisfy this list? Thursday night I finally had my Eureka. Ask your little sister to style it for you! So thanks to my 19 year old sister, my Mohawk do came alive.

So as my sister is doing my hair and her, my mom, and I are talking, my mother tells me she ran into a lady I met about Sisterlocks. At first I thought Linda, but she said that name didn't sound familiar. Then my mom says, "I think you met her at Sam's Club." Now to jog you all's memory, I did the post about the lady I met at Sam's Club and I was so excited that she came up to me and asked if I had Sisterlocks.

So of course I asked my mother how did this connection happen. My mom told me they met at the doctor's office and as they were talking she told the lady that she gets her hair done in Detroit and the lady says:
Lady: You are the second person I met who gets their hair done in Detroit.
My mom: Well that's probably my daughter.
Lady: Tanya?
My mom: OMG! Yep.

All I can say is wow!